I am here International

SAKI OTSUKA

写真家・画家・美術家。

幼少期から絵を描くことに惹かれ、15歳に発症した複雑性ptsdと共に生きるように絵を描き続けている。自分が「ここにいる」という一貫したメッセージを込めて創作活動を行い、自己の中心から発せられる力を客観的な写真に落し込み写真家としても活動している。インスタレーション等、作品は多岐にわたる。

東京出身、女。

2012年にセルフポートレート写真集“密賣NUDE”がERECT Magazineから発売される。

著書「よわむし」

​展示歴・掲載誌等

Photo Book
□密賣NUDE :ERECT Lab 2012年6月28日
□川上ゆう写真集 W[ウーマン] : 徳間書店 2015年09月29日
□川上ゆう写真集「裸」東京キララ社2022.6発売



Book
□アサヒカメラ 2015年7月増大号 □ヌードアーカイブス2013/2015 □プロフェッショナル・ヌードフォト3
□潜行̃地下アイドルの人に言えない生活 姫乃たま著□ERECTMagazine001/002
□写真芸術・韓国2019□CAPA 2021/​1月号□Artコレクターズ2021年7月号
□GENIC vol.62

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Exhibition
□東京・UPLINK＆大阪Pulp個展「密賣NUDE 」写真展 2012
□東京・KATA group exhibition 「PENG!」 絵画展 2014
□東京:AMP Cafe＆大阪・Pulp＆福岡:ART SPACE 貘 写真巡回展・個展 「MEME」2015
□東京・HATCH 大塚咲 × 黒坂麻衣 絵画展『Symmetrically』 2015
□東京・渋谷ダイトカイ　個展『GENBA PHOTO』写真展 2015
□東京・神保町画廊&大阪・Pulp 個展『3P』写真展 2016　
​□東京・湾岸画廊　大塚咲絵画展」2017
□東京・神保町画廊　個展「me」セルフポートレート写真展 2017
□福岡・アートスペース貘　個展「MEME5nd」写真展 2017
​□大阪・PULP 個展「me＋MEME」写真展 2017
​□東京・神保町画廊&大阪・Pulp 個展「HAREAME」絵画展 2018
□東京・神保町画廊&大阪・Pulp 個展「decoreate」PhotoPaint Exhibithon 2018
​□福岡・アートスペース獏　個展「MEME BLUE YELLOW」写真展2019
□東京・弘重ギャラリー&大阪・Pulp 「ニアリーイコール」大塚咲×七菜乃企画写真展2019
​□東京・人間レストラン 個展「HOTEL-B」写真展 2019
□東京・清アートスペース 個展「さようなら大塚咲」写真展 2019
□東京・神保町画廊　個展「私たちは共鳴している（MEME)」写真展 2019
□東京・人間レストラン 個展「愛しい、のこと」写真展 2020
□東京・清アートスペース 個展「始まりから」写真、絵画、PhotoPaint Exhibithon 2020
□東京・神保町画廊　個展「日々に咲く 日々に咲け」絵画展2020
□東京・人間レストラン 花道家上野雄次×大塚咲 2人展「人間達」絵画参加 2020
□大阪・POLギャラリー 個展「日々は咲く」絵画展 2020
□台湾・アートフェアONE ART TAIPEI　 (Bossgallery）PhotoPaint 作品個展参加 2021
□東京・GalleryETHER 個展「女であるために」 Photo & PhotoPaint 展 2021
□東京・長亭ギャラリー 個展「HOTEL-B」PhotoPaint 展 2021
□東京・gallery FACE TO FACE 個展「私であるために」絵画展 2021

□東京・UCHIGO and SHIZIMI Gallery 個展「私という赤、境界線の青」2021
□東京・清アートスペース 個展「私に花束」写真、絵画、PhotoPaint展 2021
□東京・神保町画廊 個展「光になる」写真制作10周年記念展2021
□大阪・POLギャラリー 個展個展「私と光と花」2021
□東京・上野松坂屋グループ展 -contemporary-　UENO芸術祭×KENZAN 2021
□福岡・アートスペース獏　個展「指輪」写真展 2022
□東京・長亭ギャラリー 二人展「二人の写真家の自画像」写真展 2022
□東京・清アートスペース 個展「幸せを知る花」絵画展 2022
□東京・フェイストゥフェイス「私に咲く花」2022年11月



Drawn to creating art since childhood, SAKI OTSUKA continues to work while living with c-PTSD, which developed at the age of 15. She creates works with a consistent message of "I am here.", also working as a photographer, she draws from the power that emanates from the center of the self to create objective photographs. Her works are diverse, often including installations.

From the Artist:

"Ever since that day when I was 15, I have lost myself.

Since that day, the nightmares I repeatedly have, the damage I’ve accumulated, and the wounds caused by words have become an enormous pain that remains in my heart.

I live my life with c-PTSD.

My paintings and photographs exist to show that “I am here” after having lost myself to sexual abuse.

Paintings

I’ve been drawing and painting since my childhood. Images came into my mind one after another, and I wanted to become a painter. Now, to reflect the state of my mind, I make two different types of paintings: one is filled with details and small circles, the other is roughly spread ink and paint. Characteristically, the mood and style of my paintings varies with my mental state. The circles are me and proof that “I am here”. I draw them one by one in order to regain my lost self. The ink and paint that I work roughly and vigorously are me, the liberation of my suppressed self.

For me, I am a soul. To regain the soul I’ve lost, I paint and fill myself with new life

Photography

The feeling and knowing that “I am here” is captured in my photography, both subjectively and objectively. As a subject, I modeled for many photographers. The ideas and poses that came from me were always seen as the photographer’s, not mine. The photos that showed my life were also seen as the photographer’s, not mine. I grew so tired of being robbed and began photographing myself, because I am mine.

The feeling and knowing that “I am here” led me to these images that emanate from my past memories and trauma. Starting from self-portraits that traced my past and inner self, I have come to shoot a wide range of subjects, including women, male and female nudes, and landscapes.

The self-portrait works include “Sacrifice” and “Drowning”, which depict sexual abuse, “me”, a collage of me being trampled by men, “Decorate”, a series of painted photos created after realizing I was, in response to my trauma, avoiding having any kind of conspicuous appearance, and “MONSTER”, a self-portrait and installation series informed by my struggle with c-PTSD. My photographic work is still largely self-oriented. The difficulty of living for women is a burden I share, and I think that nudity reveals the wounds of sex and desire, at least, that’s the only reality I’ve ever seen.

My ongoing crow and mountain series express the pain of my childhood, and I believe them to be linked to the misunderstanding of sexual abuse victims and their anger.

Landscape photography is, in a sense, another kind of self-portrait that reaffirms to me that “I am here”. The everyday world in which I exist, the scenery that I find beautiful, the record of the time I have spent, all of these things are reality, and I am a self-portrait of the world in which I exist."

SAKI OTSUKA

Born in Tokyo
Female


SAKI OTSUKA HP